It’s been four months since my last post and I thought I’d finally run out of ideas but then, as has often been the case, Caroline said something that produced a deluge of thoughts and ideas.
If someone asks you, “What is the capital city of France?”, you can answer straight away. You answer, “Paris,” in the confident knowledge that you had supplied all the information they needed.
Some questions, however, need at least one preliminary response before a definite and accurate answer may be given.
“Where did you leave the book?” would probably need at least one query (“Which book?”) before a precise response could be given.
There are questions that have to be answered immediately. Any delayed response that seeks clarification, could result in the questioner becoming offended or upset.
“Do you like my hair?” is a query that in theory, has two or three possible answers but in reality, there is only one answer that can be given and that answer is an immediate, “YES!”
Some questions are so vague that an immediate answer is impossible. I was thinking about this a week ago when a question was asked by a woman on a closed Facebook group of which I’m a member.
“Where’s a good place to get a MOT?”
I could think of a number of questions I would need to ask before giving an informed answer but I wrote nothing because, very soon, 11 people had named about 20 places.
I couldn’t see how they were any help to the questioner whatsoever. She could have discovered them and many others by using Google. Also, the places recommended were in an area of about 200 square miles and so some of them must be much further from her than others.
That thought obviously occurred to another member who wrote:
“This is a strange question. MOTs are objective assessments. There can be no leeway given and so no place is better or worse than any other.
If any business gets a reputation for passing vehicles that would fail on other places, that business would lose its MOT licence.
If, what you are actually asking is, “Where can I take my car for a MOT where they will pass it even if there are faults with it?” you should delete it now for the safety of all road users.”
Her reply didn’t answer his point in any way:
“I'm not asking for a MOT place where they will pass it just like that. I have grandkids in the car. Safety is my first thing.”
He came back with: “So, what was the point of your question? Go to the one closest to you.”
From that point the “Lady” who had asked the question became vitriolic and her comments were abusive and liberally scattered with obscenities which, for some reason, the group administrator allowed to pass.
There is at least one question that is often answered with some degree of a lie and that is when someone asks, “How are you?” I and almost everyone answers with some variation of, “Fine thanks,” but sometimes, that isn’t the case. However, it would be crass and tiresome to answer by telling them exactly how you really are feeling.
I’ve been trying to think of a question that someone might ask me that would necessitate me asking the greatest number of follow-ups before I could give a reliable answer.
Recently, as I was walking out of a shop in Milton Keynes Centre, a woman asked me where the nearest bus stop was. Of course, I had to ask her where she wanted to go before I could help but because of that, I think that question scores very highly on the Vague Scale.
“Can you tell me where there’s a bus stop please?”
The elucidatory question that would have to be asked is, “Where are you going to?”
Follow up questions could be:
1 How far are you able to walk to reach it?
2 Would you prefer a covered, sheltered bus stop?
Caroline and I drove into the local Garden Centre car park recently. I thought we were there just to visit the Food Hall but it immediately became apparent that Caroline thought we were there to collect bags of compost that she had ordered.
The place was very busy and there were more than 150 cars in the there. Caroline asked me a question that scored so highly on the Vague Scale that it broke it.
“Will you get behind that car in the compost collection queue, please?”
“Where’s that?”
“That car in the queue. Get behind it.”
“Which car?”
“That one.”
“Which one? There are loads of them.”
“The silver one.”
“That doesn’t help.”
“The one going up a slight slope.”
“What!!!!!”
Eventually, by pointing her finger (and raising her voice somewhat), she was able to direct me to the collection point.
What she could have said was, “I need to collect some compost I’ve ordered. Keep driving slowly and I’ll direct you to the collection point.”
But then, this post would never have appeared.
